Let It Go

There are so many things that pass through the day to day. Thoughts in an out, anxieties big and small. But I'm learning to let things go. There's so much that I cannot control in life. I generally get so stressed about my health.. if I get sick or injured it seems a huge failure and i feel so bad about myself, so frustrated. Likewise I have, over and over beat myself up for the relationship issues I've had. I'm stupid, I'm insecure, I set myself up for failure.

And in having those anxieties, I don't want to mess up, I want to be perfect. I want to manage my time, be healthy and make no more relationship mistakes. But a lot of it is out of my control. I can eat well and stay active and try to get enough sleep generally and that's about it. sometimes I will get sick, sometimes I will tear ligaments :(

and I can't know ahead of time for the most part if someone is going to be a complete jerk. Relationships, they require a lot of risk and you just don't know someone till you know them.

So I'm learning to let go of a lot of anxiety. I can't hold onto anything anyway. No amount of desire and over control can force anything. I'm learning to enjoy my day to day, good with the bad.